Friday, October 18, 2013

Progress

Dan is now in 9th grade and going into his 5th year of playing the cello.  We have always attended performances and taken Sam, who is now 10 and in 5th grade. I learned quickly that attending would require a lot of prep and patience.  Sam easily became frustrated and I can only assume that a crowd of people played a role. When I was too busy to fully prep before a performance it showed.  Even when I was prepared there have been some very challenging nights.  We have learned over time little things to help but I can't say we had ever experienced an evening stress free.  Things like having someone go early to save the seats closest the least busy door then showing up with Sam just as it starts or just as Dan's performance would begin, depending on the program, was helpful.  We have rarely ever stayed for an entire performance and leave after Dan's part. Sometimes I have driven back and forth to the High School 5 times to make it all work.

So, Why have we tried so hard to make our Sam go?  He loves music and has the local NPR station going 24/7 in his bedroom, or his preferred CD of choice which is a Christmas album of Voice Male on infinite repeat.  He has been exposed to a variety of music and loves it.  He hates singing time in primary at church though.  Its too loud and says everyone is off and doesn't sound right.  Rarely can he stay in the room.  So in my mind this is where he should be, enjoying the music he loves in other settings.

Last night we had Dan's first actual High School performance.  The orchestra was first.  This time I assumed we would stay for all since we have friends in the band and symphonic ensemble.  The only prep done was to make sure Sam knew the routine for the night (I failed to even include the part about staying for the whole performance) and had his kindle charged with headphones ready.  When I looked over during the 4th piece of music he was bouncing his head with the rhythm and smiled back at me.  He was clearly enjoying but did ask how soon before midnight we'd get home, when they switched to the band. He got frustrated with my answer because I didn't know and guessed at the ending time rather than saying how many hours from midnight that was. But he sat through almost an entire additional hour of performances where some of it got pretty loud.  He was completely engaged in the music and really enjoying it.  I actually teared up because it felt so significant to me when I realized just how far he has come and that the effort and patience is beginning to pay off.  I felt hope that some day we'd be sitting in that same place watching his performance some day!

So just a message of hope for those who struggle.  Sometimes we will get to a point where we can look back and recognize that our effort and time does make a difference in the long run.